Wemberly

There's a children's book called Wemberly Worried and I read it to my class every year. The character is a little mouse who worries about everything. My favorite part is when she worries that everyone will be a butterfly in the Halloween parade. When she arrives, she realizes there are no other butterfly costumes. Then she worries because she is the only one.

Infertility has made me a Wemberly. . .

I don't want to be a Wemberly.

Now that I've hit the second trimester, I've found a new set of things to obsess over. My recent one- cervical incompetence.

Where did I come up with this one you ask? A couple days ago I was sitting on my hard chair at my desk and I felt this cervical/vaginal twinge/pain. It only lasted a few seconds, but from then on the rest of the day I was acutely aware of my lady parts. And I felt/imagined them to be sore. From what I read from Dr. Google, cervical incompetence usually is associated with no feeling or pain. Your cervix just spontaneously dilates without contractions. (Oh, and only 1/100 women present with it. What makes me think I'm so special?). A previous "traumatic" (they dilated you too quickly) D & C puts you at higher risk. I've had a D&C before when I was 19 for extremely heavy and irregular periods (see, I've never been normal "down there"). How do I know if it was traumatic or not? I don't.

Does the logical part of me think I should even let this be a worry right now? Of course not. But the tragic thing I found from this is that they let women go through one, two, or three previous second trimester miscarriages before they consider you at risk for it. How hard is it for doctors to check your cervix at each appt.? It's something that isn't usually done until the end of third trimester.

You can bet your ass, my doctor will check mine on Tuesday at my next appt. Whether she wants to or not. I will just need to explain to her I'm an IF patient. We worry more than the rest and if she can't understand that then maybe I need to find a new doctor. One that specializes in treating Wemberlies.

Stay tuned for my next "Worry of the Week". . .

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Now onto better topics.

14 Weeks

I've loved being able to look down and see my pooch. I catch the kids in my class staring at it too. I have been popping out quickly. I think it's because my abs weren't toned in the slightest before pregnancy and with my small frame there is no where for anything to go.

And my least favorite reason I'm getting big so fast. . . My husband was 11 lbs. 14 oz when he was born (vaginally). They had to break his collarbone to get him out. He comes from a family of huge babies (0n both sides). I'm only 5'2". What's a girl to do?

DH is getting so excited. Seeing me expand has made it more real for him. Last night at dinner he said, "I can't wait to shop for baby clothes." I almost choked on my sandwich. I thought it was so cute. I never thought I'd hear that sentence come from him.

Meanwhile, I've done nothing to prepare for this baby. Nothing, nada, zilch. No thought has been given to childcare. I haven't purchased a thing. I haven't researched car seats, cribs, or changing tables. I haven't even browsed a baby aisle. That is not like me. I am a person who is prepared and organized.


I feel my only job right now is to grow a healthy baby.

All the rest will fall into place.